"I have no relationship with God"

A Bektashi man,

Was sitting in his garden.

In front of him was a slice of white cheese.

And a small bowl

Carved from a walnut tree.

The bowl was full of wine.

He was drinking his wine in peace.

The Bektashi had carved the bowl

From the walnut tree himself.

He had polished it clean inside and out.

It had become a very beautiful wine bowl.

As the Bektashi was sipping his wine,

He looked up,

And saw the imam in front and the congregation behind,

Walking in a hurry while reciting the takbir.

When the Bektashi saw them in this state,

He asked:

-“What is going on, gentlemen?

What is this rush?

Where are you headed?”

The imam replied:

-You wouldn't understand.

You wouldn't know.

But I will tell you anyway.

We are going to pray for rain.”

The Bektashi asked:

-Can't you do it here?

The imam replied:

-No.

We have to climb all the way to the top of those mountains across.

We will pray there.”

The Bektashi asked:

-Hey, who are you going to pray to?

Who are you going to ask for rain from?

Who will give you the rain?”

The imam replied:

-We will pray to God.

God will give us the rain.”

The Bektashi asked:

-Is God on top of that mountain across?”

The imam was furious and fuming.

-You heretic infidel!

Don't confuse our minds and our faith.”

Then he called out to the congregation behind him.

-Come on, let's go.”

The Bektashi said:

-Oh, don't do it, don't go.

What business do you have on top of those snowy mountains?

At least have pity on the elderly among you.

Most of you cannot climb

Those steep cliffs.

Don't go.

I will make it rain

For you.”

The imam asked:

-How will you make it rain, you heretic?

Go on, make it rain and let us see.”

The Bektashi called out to his wife:

-Wife, bring the laundry.

Let's hang it on the clothesline so it can dry.”

His wife said:

-My husband, she said,

Don't you know our friend,

He hits us with rain just to spite us and gets the laundry wet.”

The Bektashi said:

-Just bring it.

Maybe our friend has given up his stubbornness.”

Anyway,

The poor woman,

Came out with a basket of laundry.

The Bektashi and his wife

Started hanging the laundry.

They finished hanging the laundry.

A little while later, a light rain began.

The imam was astonished.

The congregation was astonished.

But everyone was

Pleased and happy

That it was raining.

Then the imam

And the congregation went home

With this joy and astonishment.

One day, five days,

For ten whole days

It rained continuously.

The villagers went to the imam and said:

-Oh, Imam Efendi, the rain won't stop.

The place is being flooded.

It has been raining non-stop for ten days.”

The imam said:

-You are right, he said.

Come on, gather up.

We are going to the Bektashi's house.

However this man made it rain,

He should stop it the same way.”

The imam in front and the congregation behind,

They came to the Bektashi's house.

Anyway, the Bektashi came out to the front of the door.

-What is going on, gentlemen? What is this state, what is this rush, he said.”

The imam said:

-What else could it be?

The place is being flooded.

However you made this rain fall,

Stop it the same way.”

The Bektashi said:

-Fine, that's easy, he said.”

He called out to his wife.

-Wife, he said.

Take the laundry basket and come here.

Our friend continues to mock us.

Come, let's collect the laundry.”

They collected the laundry.

They took it inside and started drying it indoors.

The rain stopped too.

The imam and the congregation were all astonished.

The imam asked with curiosity:

-How did this happen?

What is this secret?”

The Bektashi replied:

-Well, Imam Efendi, he said.

I have no relationship with God.

We are at odds with each other.

Whenever I hang out laundry, he

Mocks us.

He wants to annoy us.

He makes it rain.

He hits our laundry and gets it wet.”